Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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