i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Quick, to the slutcave!
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
And then the night went full on bisexual.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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