Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
