Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
