there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
