Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
home. puking in laundry basket.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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