id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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