Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
please come you make the beer taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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