Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
