I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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