Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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