other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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