I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
