Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
