Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize