Jerry, you need to find god
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
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