So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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