If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
