She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
