My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
