Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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