His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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