smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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