i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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