I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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