i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
