Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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