so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
