I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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