Swine flu. Run for my life!
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
