I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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