susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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