he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize