is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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