dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize