he told me I talked like a deaf person
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
