Heybabeimwearingurpanties
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Randomize
