why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Randomize
