nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize