There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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