so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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