Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
