No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
