ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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