Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize