Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize