She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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