thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
A bitchslap is in order.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
