I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize