I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
