Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize