Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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